


She Can't Help It

by daisybrien



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Arguing, Bathing Each Other, Bathing/Washing, Bathtubs, Bickering, F/M, Fluff, Hair Washing, Humor, Humour, M/M, Multi, Other, Polyamory, Sensuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 04:30:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5192390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daisybrien/pseuds/daisybrien
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi takes advantage of Hange's sleeping habits and Erwin's soft heartedness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	She Can't Help It

**Author's Note:**

> For Erurihan Week 2015

Hange had always been a heavy sleeper. 

She had always been a snorer, a drooler, a tossing and turning, violent blanket hog, and the devil reborn to anyone she has ever had shared a bed with. Her odd sleeping habits were nothing new to her, and were often a usual topic of kind teasing, and she accepted them with the grace that many ugly sleepers would vehemently deny in their waking hours. She had grown proud of being one to sleep grossly, laughing at the idea of any partner having to sleep next to her, or even grow fond of her apparently gruesome appearance. It was something she couldn’t help, so she easily accepted it as something she couldn’t change. She never hated herself for it – never found a need to hate herself for anything, in fact – and took her ugly sleeping habits with ease.

What she did hate were the implications of her heavy sleep 

One minute she had been nodding off at her desk, eyes burning as she scribbled jumbled thoughts across her paper, and the next there is water bubbling in her ears, the bright bathroom light searing her eyes enough for a migraine to bloom at her temples. 

It was her blissful unawareness of what happened to her when asleep that she loathed; her own head smacking against the desk in exhaustion, the spilled ink seeping over her notes and hair, the feeling of arms dragging her and dumping her into a bathtub all going unnoticed. It is only when she feels fingers tugging through her hair, yanking at her scalp that her mind is disturbed enough to jolt her from unconsciousness.

She wakes up as gracelessly as she sleeps, darting up from the metal basin, limbs flailing, gasping for breath as she tosses up water around her. She hears someone curse as water splashes across the dirty tiles, and she only settles back down once she recognizes the familiar grey walls of the barrack latrines.

“Levi,” she groans. She leans her head back against the rim of the tub, draping one arm over her eyes to block out the bright latern above her. Her head throbs. “How many times do I have to tell you to stop knocking me out?”

She moves her arm slightly as the light is shaded above her. Small, grey eyes glare down at her, shadowed by Levi’s black hair as it hangs over his forehead, tickling her nose. His mouth is a thin, white line, twisted into a scowl.

“The only thing that knocked you out was your own recklessness,” Levi says. He moves, the light of the lantern shining down at her again, and she flinches at it. “It’s not my fault you work yourself into fucking exhaustion.”

“You want to give me a reason for my migraine then?” she quips.

“Same reason there’s an ink stain the size of your forehead on the notes you just so happened to fall asleep on.”

Hange jumps at the words, too deep and charming to be coming from the brutal voice of the man hanging above her. She raises her head up, a small ache settling in her neck as it cranes to look over the opposite end of the tub. She smirks, crossing her ankles as she lounges back, moving one foot to reveal a blond head of hair kneeling down at the foot of the tub.

“Well, look who decided to show up, too,” Hange purrs. She watches as the corner of Erwin’s mouth quirks up, returning her grin. 

“You can thank Levi’s persistence on it,” Erwin says.

“Didn’t take much, anyway,” Levi grunts. “Not when we can smell you from the other side of the building.”

“Rude,” Hange says.

“I’m not going to lie to you,” Levi says. His hands work further into her hair, his nails picking at the tiny knots that had worked into it. 

“Doesn’t mean it isn’t rude.”

“Like you give a fuck,” Levi says. Despite the malice in his voice, his obvious annoyance at having to take responsibility for her basic grooming, there is a spark of mischief in the lilt of his voice. “Don’t tell me you’re going to get all blubbery on me.”

“It wouldn’t kill you to be nicer, you know,” Hange sings. There is a chuckle by her feet, and she can almost feel Levi’s glare above her, shooting through the air like a bullet.

“It wouldn’t kill you to bathe, either.”

“I don’t need cleanliness,” she sighs, “especially since I don’t need it to make up for any sour personality.”

There is a snort of laughter by the end of the tub, and her own satisfied cackling joins in with it. Their laughter is short lived as Levi’s hands suddenly gain their renewed vigour as they scrub her down, nails running along her scalp firmly enough to be painful. When he moves towards her hairline, he pushes soap past her hairline onto her forehead, which slowly threatens to flow into her eyes. A muscle in her neck screams in pain when her head jolts back, wincing as he pulls at her hair.

She gives a grating cry in protest, turning around to look up at him. One hand wipes away the suds that slowly creep into the corner of her eyes, failing to stop the inevitable burning. 

“You don’t have to be so harsh!” she cries, glowering at his vacant expression.

“It’s not my fault you don’t take care of your hair.”

“It is your fault for tearing at it like a madman,” she grumbles. She grunts indignantly as his hands grasp her shoulders, turning her away from him and firmly pushing her back against the inside of the tub again. She crosses her arms over her bare chest, one hand rising to rub at her stinging eye. “Sometimes I think you enjoy making me suffer.”

“I could say the same for you,” Levi says. “Both of you, but especially you.”

“Hm,” Hange hums. She smirks at Erwin as one hand rises up behind her. Her fingers find Levi’s chin, trailing down to delicately dance across the wiry tendons in his neck. She can trace the marks she had left on him days before, pinpointing each hickey on his flushing skin without even looking. They are the spots on him that are reused and abused; she knows him well enough to find his sensitive spots in the time of a wanton breath. “You like it when I hurt you.”

“Maybe I’m just returning the favour.”

“Well, you’re doing a crap job of it,” she says. “At least Erwin and I try to make it pleasurable.”

“There is nothing pleasurable about this for me, that’s for sure,” Levi grunts quietly.

“You seem to have dragged Erwin in here,” Hange hums. “Maybe he’ll do better washing my hair.”

“Oh no,” Levi says, “he’s here for another job. One he seems to be neglecting.”

Hange hums at those words, raising her eyebrows as she turns towards Erwin. His head falls as he moves forward, hands rising up. At first, she flinches, squealing, his fingertips tickling the soles of her feet. It is only when she starts to feel the motion of his thumbs kneading the balls of her feet that she sinks back into the tub. She groans in pleasure, the pressure releasing a tension she didn’t know she could possess, giving out a small hearty laugh as Erwin gives her a pained but loving smile, his cheeks glowing red with embarrassment. 

“Look at you,” she hums. She smiles at him, and he bows his head sheepishly. “Levi has you doing the most brutal job.”

“I don’t mind,” Erwin says, “unless of course, you wanted me to wash your hair for you.”

“Don’t even think of fucking moving,” Levi growls. His hands begin to grow gentler as the knots work their way out, yanking turning to soft tugs that prickle at her head almost comfortably. “I’d rather wash her nest of hair than touch those feet. That’s saying something.”

“So you give me the most brutal job,” Erwin says.

“Wow, Levi, what kind of man,” Hange hums. “To think they’d call you the strongest man of our civilization, and you’re scared of a pair of feet.” She jerks her head towards the ceiling, Erwin sighing in relief as he obeys the motion, rising from his spot. He moves to the side of the tub. Hange hangs one hand over the lip of the tub, droplets falling from her nails and dotting the tile floor. Erwin takes it in his own. She winks at him “You shouldn’t make Erwin suffer from that.”

“We’re both suffering, trust me,” Levi says. “Be thankful Erwin has enough tolerance to actually do that for you.”

“You’re implying you have no tolerance yourself.”

“Like I need to.”

Hange rolls her eyes, shimmying her shoulders as she sinks into the warm bathwater. Her one hand moves up Erwin’s arm, brushing over his shoulder, trailing up his neck and moving to grasp at the fine hairs at its nape. He sighs as her nails run over his sensitive skin, and she pulls him forward. His chin moves to rest on her upper arm as she runs her nails through his hair, messing up his part. He looks up at her with wide, blue eyes; he has let his guard down in this rare moment of intimacy, let himself bask in the affection he seemed to enjoy vehemently refusing. She makes sure to be as loving as possible, even more than those staring blue orbs soften her up; he barely gets this chance, let alone lets himself have it. She might as well make sure he has enough comfort to last him until he gives in again.

“Of course you don’t,” she says breathily, closing her eyes against the bright light above her. Her hand works through Erwin’s part in a rhythm, matching Levi’s own. “You make it very obvious how horribly bothersome the two of us can be.”

“Stop being massive shits and I won’t have to,” Levi deadpans. She feels Erwin’s shoulders shake in a small laugh against her. “Don’t you fucking laugh, you can be just as bad.”

“You know you don’t have to concern yourself with us,” Erwin suggests. He cocks one eyebrow, looking up at Levi with the inklings of a mischievous grin. Despite being huddled on the floor beside her, he looks big, puffing out a large chest and shoulders meant to commandeer, his massive and intimidating presence in the room stifling enough to raise a tinge of pink in Levi’s flustered face. 

Hange cranes her neck, peering up at him from below. He avoids her gaze. “He’s right.”

“No, he fucking isn’t,” Levi sputters. “I’m constantly making sure you two don’t get killed.”

“We’re all adults here,” she groans. 

“We can take care of ourselves,” Erwin says.

“Prove it to me,” Levi says. He starts to push Hange deeper into the tub, guiding her head back. “Then maybe I won’t have to watch you guys every fucking day.”

“Okay, that’s unfair-“ she hears Erwin say, but it is cut off as her head falls back. Muted nothingness swishes in her ears, and she hears muffled, distorted voices above her, the dainty trickle of seemingly distant water as Levi’s hands continue in their ministrations. It is strangely calming, nothing but the soft murmur of tiny waves surrounding her.

Her curiosity wins over the peacefulness in the end, and she pulls her head up to the sound of the two bickering.

“Stop whining you two,” she interrupts. 

“Nobody’s whining,” Erwin says.

“It’s not my fault none of you guys know how to keep yourselves alive,” Levi says.

“Oh please, Levi,” Hange snorts. “You just don’t want to admit that you actually care for us.”

Her hands move to grip the edges of the tub, knees bending as she tries to lift herself. As she moves, the ache in her head spreads, and she can feel the weakness in her muscles from the emptiness of her belly. Her head spins as she straightens, black spots in her vision from getting up too fast, and she only realizes that the soles of her feet are slipping on the bottom of the tub once she has toppled into both their arms.

Hange falls mostly on Levi, who curses as he stumbles backwards, her height overpowering him. She digs her fingers into his sleeves, feels the muscle grow taut from under the fabric that clings to them. She realizes then that he is only in a shirt and underwear. Both of them are.

It is Erwin who helps the two of them untangle, pulling Hange off him. He takes one arm while Levi takes the other, Hange leaning on them as she lifts one foot out of the tub.

“You’re lucky I actually care about you, too,” Levi says, “and that I haven’t gotten tired of hating to do it yet.”

“Oh, Levi, you know that’s a lie.” Hange teases. She starts to move forward, draping her arms over his shoulders, clasping her hands by the nape of his neck. Her fingers twirl through the ends of the hair hanging over the shaved part of his head, which prickles at her palms as she moves forward to embrace him.

“Fuck off, Hange!” Levi groans. “You’re fucking soaked.” 

He tries to stumble back from her, but her grip on him is firm. She stares at him from above, sucking her lower lip between her teeth as she leans down, close enough that she can feel his breath on her lips. His hands skitter around her for a proper place lie in an attempt to shove her off, no part of her naked body seeming appropriate to touch. His eyes dart in his head, trying but failing to look back up at her; whether it was because they were drawn to her body or repelled from the challenge in her eyes, she can’t tell, but she knows the red in his ears and the stutter of his voice isn’t from his anger to have her dripping all over the floor.  
It is Erwin who saves him; she feels something warm and soft around her, brushing over her skin. He drapes it over her shoulders, and she accepts the towel to Levi’s relief, wrapping it around her.

“You know that’s not the reason you don’t want me this close,” Hange murmurs. One corner of her mouth quirks up in the smallest of grins, one that she fails to stifle as she watches the frustrated fury of pink cheeks and furrowed brows bloom on Levi’s face. “You also know that you don’t hate to take care of us.”

“Bullshit.”

“I know it’s hard to admit,” Hange says. “I know you’re that kind of person. And you’re also not the kind of person to bother with things you couldn’t give less than two shits about.

“So I have to say, on me and Erwin’s behalf,” she breathes. She leans in agonizingly slowly, her lips brushing his in a chaste peck of the lips before she jumps back from him, leaving him standing dumbfounded. “I’m quite flattered to know you care enough to bother with us so much.”

She turns around, Levi sputtering in her wake, taking Erwin’s hand in hers. She wraps his arm over her shoulders, the two walking out into the bedroom outside. “I need something to eat,” she says, one hand patting her stomach. “Let’s go to the kitchen.”

She leaves a trail of water behind her, one that Levi fixes his eyes on in his humiliation. He grumbles to himself as he starts moving about the room, draining the tub and wiping the floor.

“He’s going to kill you,” Erwin murmurs, but his face is almost breaking under the strain of his smile, his shoulders shaking in soft laughter.

“Oh, he has no need to be mad at me,” Hange says. She turns to look over her shoulder before she steps out of the room, winking at she leaves Levi cursing and blushing in his wake. Her own face is hot itself, and she makes a mental note to pay him a visit that will no doubt make him forgive her torment graciously. “It’s not like we would ever completely leave him so helpless like that. Right?”

Erwin grins, leaning down to kiss her wet hair. One hand reaches up to brush his hair back, the other pressing her against him. He leads her out, turning away from the stairs that lead to the canteen. She doesn’t question it, and neither does she mind it, only wondering which one of their rooms he will lead her into. “Of course we wouldn’t.”

“You can tell me not to be mad when I’m not the one bathing you every week,” Levi calls after them, tapering off into a stifled groan.

“I can’t help it,” she calls back, giddily shaking as Erwin pulls her towards his room, catching Levi watching where they are going with a shake of the head and a glazed look of neediness out of the corner of her eye. She knows he is going to follow. “It’s nice to know I don’t have to groom myself with you two here.”


End file.
